A VERY BRITISH DAY OUT

‘Authentic Beach Barbecue’ the leaflet had assured them.

Archie had his doubts. The nearest beach was at least thirty miles away for a start. Just another anomaly in the zoo that combined as an amusement park.

Two pasty-looking teenagers wheeled out trays covered in tinfoil and started unwrapping the precooked food.

Agnes perched herself on one of the plastic flamingos that surrounded the glorified sandpit, glad to rest her feet after traipsing round the animal enclosures all day. ‘Hardly feels like we’re in Hawaii.’

‘Well, we’ve paid for it. Might as well stay and enjoy it.’

Agnes huffed but conceded. They joined the queue. Assorted meats were piled high. Archie couldn’t help but picture the sad-looking animals in cages they had been viewing all day as a slab of charred steak was deposited on his plate.

They sat down to eat, joined at the table by a group of noisy middle-aged ladies. The entertainment began. Jaded-looking hula dancing girls in grass skirts shuffled around while an ageing crooner appeared and gave tired renditions of Hawaiian songs.

***

Later that night, perched over the hotel toilet as the steak took its revenge, Archie vowed never to use an online discount deal again.


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Copyright Susan Spaulding

Written as part of Sunday Photo Fiction. Write a story of around 200 words based on the photo prompt given (above). Hosted by Susan Spaulding. For more details visit HERE.

To read more of the stories based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

This is the 25th story featuring Agnes and Archie – you can read more of their adventures here: THE AGNES AND ARCHIE STORIES.

42 responses to “A VERY BRITISH DAY OUT”

  1. violaetcetera Avatar
    violaetcetera

    I really like how often you twist your stories with the last sentence.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Viola 🙂

      Like

  2. Liked it Iain, and could identify!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. We’ve all been there once or twice. Thanks Di.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh the disappointment – the pasty teenage set this up wondering? I suspect this could be a worldwide cheap day out. I was left wondering if the animals were in the dinner….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. True, probably not exclusive to Britain!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Well, it actually turned out better than I expected 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wonder what bad experiences you have had on days out!?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s usually raining for a start…

        Liked by 1 person

      2. There is that! 🙂

        Like

  5. Laughing out Loud.
    I could see the jaded hula dancers on my mind’s screen!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Frances, glad I gave you a chuckle 🙂

      Like

  6. Could have saved a fortune and just gone to Coatbridge

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Funnily enough, took the kids to a park in Coatbridge not that long ago. The sun was shining, they had a ball and no one got food poisoning 🙂

      Like

  7. Oh my! I did not see that ending coming! What fun. Thanks for the giggle.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Laura, you’re very welcome 🙂

      Like

  8. Two thoughts: you get what you pay for and garbage in, garbage out.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Ah poor Archie. Bet Agnes was laughing. You get what you pay for?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. A definite case of should’ve paid a little extra and gone somewhere a bit more upmarket!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I could almost envisage the scene – I’m glad Archie was there not me!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve had one or two days out like this, but fortunately not too many!

      Liked by 1 person

  11. “The steak took its revenge.” I love it.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Poor Archie, suffering from the great tourist spot’s revenge without even getting to travel to an exciting destination! You paint a terribly dreary scene — I certainly hope that this isn’t the typical British day out. If so, no wonder they’d stay in! And I even more fervently hope that my upcoming trip to Hawaii doesn’t resemble this in the least!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sure Hawaii itself will live up to expectations! Actually this year the weather has been amazing for the last 6 weeks and we’ve managed some wonderful days out, avoiding any plastic flamingos! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Here’s to the great weather continuing!

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Oh dear! Sounds like one of my budget vacays–except I’d be one of the rambunctious middle-aged ladies with cast-iron stomachs. Aloha-laid-low!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, I can just see you at that barbecue, life of the party 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. If you only knew… 😀

        Like

  14. Thank heavens that I did not book this particularl holiday.

    Like

  15. Creative and imaginative – enjoyed it!!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I like teh twist in the last sentence, something that i have now come to expect from you. Very short, crispy sentences garnished with just the right dose of humour. Superb writing, Kelly,

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Neel, very kind.

      Like

  17. Oh dear, Iain, I can just picture this happening.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hopefully not to you 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  18. When a deal sounds too good to be true there is something fishy!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, exactly right! 🙂

      Like

  19. I could visualize this whole trip! I would hate if steak betrayed me, it’s so delicious!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, thanks Brianna! 🙂

      Like

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