ROXY

The Encore, Downtown Vegas.

Glitz and glamour away from the gaudy Strip and the drug-riddled suburb slums.

The waitresses. All young, slim, white. Wearing just enough.

There’s Roxy. Wearing just enough to conceal the mic.

All the big guns will be there: Sam G., Carlos, Big Joe.

He’s trusted enough to organise the AGM.

He’s not trusted enough to be in the room.

Wise Guys. They’re right. He’s undercover Federal.

Three years under. The strain is breaking him. He needs results to take back to J. Edgar.

He needs Roxy in the room.

He needs to put his love in harm’s way.


dinner-table-prior
Copyright Priorhouse

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

115 responses to “ROXY”

    1. That’s always the question I ask with these short snippets!

      Liked by 2 people

  1. Great tension in the clipped sentences

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Loved this. I felt the tension, the apprehension. Good one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Sandra, much appreciated.

      Like

  3. Trouble coming, hold on tight!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s not going to end well somewhere along the line.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Dear Iain,

    Atmospheric and tense. I could picture the men in suits and fedoras. Wonderfully clipped construction..

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Rochelle 🙂

      Like

  5. Excellent.
    And cool style.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks CE. Reading James Ellroy at the moment, the style is rubbing off, though he is undoubtedly the master of it.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. The tension of the wire. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Undercover agent and secret AGM. Thrilling plot.
    Latte Lesson – Anita

    Liked by 1 person

  8. She’s tough. She can handle it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I get that impression too, she’s holding it together more than he is.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Sounds like a Catch 22 situation…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Certainly, he’s in a difficult spot.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I loved this Iain. The short sentences really up the tension..
    And, I’m going crazy because now I have the song “Roxy” from Chicago in my head…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Apologies for the earworm Dale! Glad you liked the story 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Dang! It’s back! 😉 Just kidding.
        Yes, I did indeed.

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Hélène Vaillant Avatar
    Hélène Vaillant

    Oh how entertaining this is, had me holding on with tension. Excellent form.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. You created a great atmosphere.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Terse, taut writing that says all we need, and implies a whole lot more. Good work!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Penny

      Like

  14. Poor Roxy. You created the tension perfectly. I hope Roxy doesn’t become the sacrificial lamb.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. There’s always the chance it’ll all work out well…

      Liked by 2 people

  15. I also like the tension and the timepiece here – nice history connecting to the J Edgar time

    Liked by 1 person

  16. michael1148humphris Avatar
    michael1148humphris

    I enjoyed your vision of the pressure that being undercover creates,

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I think some wise guys will not be bit less wise in a while… but it’s tax evasion you should get from them

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Surely they must be wise to that old trick by now! Thanks Bjorn

      Like

  18. Undercover romance? Such is the trauma of the double lifel

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Scary, he’s feeling the strain of it all now, he’s probably more relaxed around the wise guys, a drink and he might let it slip.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I bet alcohol and drugs have given away a few secrets in the past!!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I think you’re absolutely correct in your assumptions!

        Like

  20. I like the double meaning of the Wise Guys line, Very mobster vibe. Sounds like you did your research.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. oooo. Well done. The tone definitely sounds tough guy. The only exception is “love” in the last line. And, yes, love the “Wise Guys” line!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Sascha – even tough guys have to love something, or someone 🙂

      Like

  22. Roxy taking big risk. Endangering life. All to please Edgar. Is this the FBI boss?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, that’s the one.

      Like

  23. Roxy might need to find her a new man!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. If she gets out of this alive first 🙂

      Like

  24. The second tension-filled story about the Mafia in a row. Now marry the two together 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have been reading a lot of mafia-based fiction recently – it is rubbing off!

      Liked by 1 person

  25. Without anything actually “going down” you’ve managed to convey a great sense of tension and stress. Nice one!

    Liked by 1 person

  26. Skillfully written Iain. The staccato style really racks up the tension.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. I honestly felt I was there, great characters Iain

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much 🙂

      Like

  28. I can tell something’s bad gonna happen. Great build-up tension.

    Liked by 1 person

  29. You just can’t trust anyone, A good piece of suspense.

    Liked by 1 person

  30. I think the suspense is killing us all!
    Great story, Iain! I’d love to know how Roxy does 🙂

    -Rachel

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Rachel, perhaps I need to write a sequel! 🙂

      Like

  31. Great suspense and tension here, Iain in an intriguing location. I wonder if what happens in Vegas is going to stay in Vegas this time.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That is the rule, so I’ve heard!

      Like

  32. That last line is a clincher. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  33. looks like a scene from a movie. very cool.

    Liked by 1 person

  34. Fabulous! Very tight scene. Well done. Poor Roxy. Sounds like she’s very good at what she does

    Liked by 1 person

  35. Just hope it’s not Capone with his baseball bat. Run, Roxy, Run.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. All bats must be left outside 🙂

      Like

  36. Great build up of the tension. A lot happening undercover in more ways than one.

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Ooh, hope he gets the desired results from putting his love in harm’s way. Are you going to build up this story, it sure sounds promising!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Anshu, we shall see!

      Like

  38. The way you arranged the writing it almost seems like the lyrics to a song!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, glad you liked the style.

      Like

  39. Great tension and explanation through those tight sentences and the slow reveal. He will never forgive himself if Roxy comes to harm.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. He would not be able to live with himself.

      Like

  40. Great choice of the name Roxy and the economical style of writing. I have an idea Roxy will be able to take care of herself.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Jilly. I agree, I think she is a tough character.

      Like

  41. Oh this is the opening to a gripping movie, for sure. So much tension!

    Liked by 1 person

  42. That was nice, there is a tension, but somehow everything is smooth and easy. Really good story.

    Liked by 1 person

  43. Poor Roxy! She’s in deep.
    I found this really interesting – the stacatto sentences each on their own line and the repetitions. Just hope Roxy makes it out alive.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, glad you appreciated the style I was going for 🙂

      Like

  44. I enjoyed the rhythm of the story and the tension you created. Poor Roxy and the undercover FBI guy. I imagine all is not going to turn out alright in the end.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Someone always gets hurt in these sort of stories!

      Like

  45. I like the repetition of just enough. At first, I imagined the girls wearing just enough to cover body-parts then you threw in the wire. Nicely done in clipped by expressive sentences.

    Liked by 1 person

  46. Ah, the good ole days with dames and shady deals and machine gun endings. I have a feeling Roxy is no dumb blonde. Great story Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

  47. There is great tension & suspense here. I also quite liked the way the characters are named. That was a very realistic touch.

    Liked by 1 person

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