IAIN KELLY

DEAL WITH THE DEVIL

The piglet squealed in the sack as Harald threw it to the ground. It landed on the unmarked grave of his former rival.

The familiar rustle approached. The huge snake slithered across the ground towards him.

‘This is the last I have,’ Harald said, pointing to the piglet.

The snake reared up and looked Harald directly in the eyes. ‘Then you sshall have to find more from ssomewhere else to honour our bargain,’ he hissed.

‘Must I forever be in your debt?’

‘You knew the conssequencess when we struck our deal.’

‘What if I cannot find anything to sacrifice to you?’

‘Then I will vissit your family and take what I wissh.’

The snake took the sack in it’s jaw and dragged it away.

Harald trudged back through the forest. He came to the clearing and looked at his farmhouse. The children were in bed. The fire in the downstairs room silhouetted Karina in the window.

Happiness came with a heavy price, murder with a heavy burden. This was the price he paid to be with the woman he loved.


photo-20170703153949475
Copyright Kecia Sparlin

Written as part of Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers. The challenge is to write a flash fiction story in around 150 words, based on the weekly photo prompt. Thanks as always to the challenge host Priceless Joy. For more information visit HERE.

To read other stories based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

49 responses to “DEAL WITH THE DEVIL”

  1. Victoria K Gallagher Avatar

    👺 The devil’s will all get it in the end…. We hope. Great story 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Victoria 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Moon Avatar
    Moon

    “Happiness came with a heavy price, murder with a heavy burden”- such a powerful line.
    Brilliant story, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, glad you like it.

      Like

  3. Priceless Joy Avatar

    Loved this story! Even the hiss of the snake written into the words. He is doomed to be at the snake’s pleasure!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I don’t see it ending well! Thanks PJ

      Like

      1. Priceless Joy Avatar

        I don’t either. Poor guy is doomed.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. yarnspinnerr Avatar

    Great write on a classic take.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. James Avatar

    Imagine her horror if she ever learned the truth.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Just one of the many bad endings this story could have. Thanks James.

      Like

  6. michael1148humphris Avatar
    michael1148humphris

    He should have stayed single. I felt sorry for the piglets.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. cfoleywriting Avatar
    cfoleywriting

    Really powerful short piece – love the image of the man forever bringing the snake sacrifices on his rivals grave.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, very kind 🙂

      Like

  8. A Writer's Beginning Avatar
    A Writer’s Beginning

    I absolutely love your take on the prompt! You’ve left just the right amount of mystery in the story, without leaving it inconclusive; that’s not an easy thing to do in so few words. I loved it, thanks for sharing 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Very kind words, thank you 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. scr4pl80 Avatar

    Perhaps the snake will get a poisoned pig?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      If only it were that simple 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Joy Pixley Avatar

    Great morality tale, showing how he’s trapped in the consequences of his evil misdeeds, and risks losing what he most values because of it. And his poor wife, caught up in it unawares! She deserved better, and those poor little piglets too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Joy, good to know I managed to convey what I intended to. Yeah, lot of love out there for the poor piglets! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Sarah Ann Avatar
    Sarah Ann

    What will Harald find next? Do we assume he murdered his rival for his wife’s hand? Indeed, that is a burden to carry without a troublesome snake to remind you. Well told.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Sarah Ann. It’s save to assume whatever happens next won’t be good news for Harald I think.

      Like

  12. Sight11 Avatar
    Sight11

    Oh…The Devil..fulfilling human desires for a ‘small price’. Good job..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you 🙂

      Like

  13. any1mark Avatar

    Everything seems cheaper when the deal is first made. Nicely done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  14. L.E.R.T Avatar

    This was good. Now, a pig. What next? Harald better find a way to kill the snake, asap.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks, I think Harald is going to find there is no easy way out of this!

      Like

  15. Michael Avatar

    Powerful story Iain very well written.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Michael

      Liked by 1 person

  16. neeltheauthor Avatar

    Excellent writing, Lian. I particularly liked the ambiguity at the end. Leaves us

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  17. David K Avatar
    David K

    Nice little tale, Iain. Be careful what you ssssow. Slippery characters those snakes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      🙂 Indeed. Thanks David.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. hombrehompson Avatar

    Nice little fable. I suspect he will never get out of this deal.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Oh no, he’s done for!

      Like

  19. mandibelle16 Avatar
    mandibelle16

    Intense story. A very high price indeed. But to protect those he loved, what choice does he have. Perhaps he could kill this snake. Then again, this snake reminds of lord Voldermort on snake form a cross between him and the devil in Eden as a snake. Both frightening adversaries to have!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I think killing the snake might not be enough, it would just reappear in another form. He has no way out I’m afraid. Thanks Mandi

      Liked by 1 person

      1. mandibelle16 Avatar
        mandibelle16

        Holy water? Crosses? Incantations from priests?

        Liked by 1 person

      2. mandibelle16 Avatar
        mandibelle16

        You’re very welcome 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  20. kalpana solsi Avatar

    The extra s in some of the words conveyed the pleasure of the snake in teasing the man. He seems to be stuck between the devil and deep sea(er emotions) . A perfect piece of story-telling.
    http://ideasolsi65.blogspot.in/2017/07/the-modern-eve.html

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much.

      Like

  21. McGuffy's Reader Avatar

    Great story. There is a contemporary, yet ancient, feel to this tale.
    The Lesson
    Annie at ~McGuffy’s Reader~

    Liked by 1 person

  22. jacquelineobyikocha Avatar

    Wow! You weave quite a story. It never pays to bargain with the wily Devil.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

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