FATHER AND SON

A PROSE POEM:

 

A shallow stream with a pebbled carpet,

Dapples of sunlight on a shimmering surface.

Bare feet cooled in ripples of water,

Shouts and laughter and joyful splashes.

A father and a son joined in play,

A precious moment clutched from memory.

 

Quiet descends on a father alone,

A shadow of the boy glimmers and fades.

That beaming smile flickers one last glint,

Before the stream lies silent in contemplation.

The rays of light still shine down,

Their warmth no longer penetrates.

 

The father kneels, racked with pain,

His tears fall on the watery plain.

One last moment with his innocent child,

One last smile or laugh or splash.

Red drops colour sparkling transparency,

The father lies down and floats away.


photo-20180219154358147
Copyright Enisa

Written as part of Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers. The challenge is to write a flash fiction story or poem in around 150 – 175 words, based on the weekly photo prompt. Thanks as always to the challenge host Priceless Joy. For more information visit HERE.

To read other stories based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

40 responses to “FATHER AND SON”

    1. Thanks Janet, trying something a little different for a change.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. This was an absolutely amazing write. I didn’t see that ending coming. Bravo.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, much appreciated.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Superb! Telling a story in verse, and sticking to the word limit is a greatet challenge than just telling a story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Reena, glad you appreciated my effort.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Absolutely brilliant Iain👍

    Liked by 1 person

  4. going dark…

    well done

    cheers.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I couldn’t let it stay light…

      Liked by 1 person

  5. An impressive write. The prose poem form is beautifully fits in with this prompt.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, I’m pleased a little change in m style worked.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Beautifully written! Loved it!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Ehhhh, here I was imaginging two happy sould only to be plucked from my merry imagery. Ahhhh, you, that ending, noooooo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sorry Joan, I had started writing something happy, but I couldn’t leave it that way!

      Like

  8. Beautiful writing Iain. I’ve convinced myself the father is only sad because his son has grown up and has lost his innocence in a non-tragic way. I’ve also decided that the father only floated away figuratively speaking (I’m struggling to ignore the red dots though). Great take.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha, the red dots are hard to explain, but I’m glad you saw that there could be an innocent reason for his son no longer being there. It does make me sad seeing how quickly my kids are growing up and those little moments drift away.

      Liked by 2 people

  9. That was amazingly tragic and as a Dad and Grandpa, there’s always the thought lying in the back of my mind about what would happen if I lost a child or grandchild.

    Interestingly enough, I also wrote about a father and son and death but from a different direction.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It is a horrible thought and a situation I hope never to have to deal with, I have no idea how any parent could come back from that.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Absolutely beautiful, Iain but such a sad ending! I loved it!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you PJ, tried something a little different this week, glad you liked it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It really is different than you normally do, but I really like it!

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Wow! That got dark really quick! That was so descriptive I almost cried! Wonderful writing!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, encouraging to know it provoked a reaction 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Excellent approach to this image Iain, though the ending was rather sad, but you had me in.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Michael, much appreciated feedback.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Beautifully sad, and a story for all times.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Wow! Very good!! You should do more prose!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, that’s very reassuring to hear 🙂

      Like

      1. You are very welcome. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  15. that was lovely , something different from your usual style

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, glad you liked the change 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  16. Hard-hitting stuff that. And amazingly brilliant.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I don’t think I’ve read a prose poem before, it is a nice change. Really beautiful 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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