IAIN KELLY

BROTHERS

Every Sunday through that summer at eleven they had sat on the same bench, Patrice and his younger brother Henri,Β waiting while their parents attended church.

At five past eleven the fountain would spring into life as the gardener,Β HervΓ©, turned it on.

Father gave them a toy boat to sail around the pond. On the warmest days they would remove their shoes and paddle in after it.

They recognised a few regulars: Madame Durand, walking her ugly pug dog; Gustav with his rubbish cart, collecting the litter; Camille, making her way home after another Saturday night of work.

Patrice remembered them all clearly. He longed for those days of innocence.

The pond was still there, the water brown and filled with algae. The fountain no longer sprung into life. The bench, rotting and broken, was empty.

An old woman shuffled past. Could it be Camille, after all this time?

In the distance the church bells tolled, the funeral was about to begin. Patrice patted the spot where Henri had always sat next to him.


photo-20180611154616095
Copyright @wildverbs

Written as part of Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers. The challenge is to write a flash fiction story or poem in aroundΒ 150 – 175 words, based on the weekly photo prompt. Thanks as always to the challenge host Priceless Joy. For more information visitΒ HERE.

To read other stories based on this week’s prompt, visitΒ HERE.

47 responses to “BROTHERS”

  1. Priceless Joy Avatar

    Awwww, Iain, this makes me sad. Such a heart touching story! I love it!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much PJ, so glad you liked it πŸ™‚

      Like

      1. Priceless Joy Avatar

        Loved how you painted the changing time!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. scr4pl80 Avatar

    Well that was sad. I lost my older sister so I know the feeling.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It’s life, unfortunately, but the happy memories live on

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Laura M Bailey Avatar

    Very beautifully written.πŸ’•

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much Laura

      Like

  4. joyroses13 Avatar

    A well done sentimental story!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Joy, I like a little bit of sentimental now and then πŸ™‚

      Like

      1. joyroses13 Avatar

        You are welcome and yes, you just never know with your stories, whether they are going to be sentimental or have everyone plunging into the Pacific Ocean. πŸ™‚
        My daughter did arrive safely by the way, now just needs a safe flight back. πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Iain Kelly Avatar

        πŸ™‚ lol hope she has a great time!

        Like

      3. joyroses13 Avatar

        Thanks! So far she is. πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

  5. CV Grehan Avatar

    I lost my Dad in April, Iain. Your stories always resonate.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Sorry for your loss CV, glad that my little story meant something.

      Like

  6. kasturi Avatar

    Your stories are aways so moving, Iain. I’m so glad I read it this morning. Loved it. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much for such a nice comment πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Reena Saxena Avatar

    We go to the same spots and hope to recapture the same moments. But everything around us has changed – so cruelly. Haven’t we?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      They certainly have, though the memories remain.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Antoinette Truglio Martin Avatar
    Antoinette Truglio Martin

    Gorgeous! One needs more.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Antoinette, a very pleasing thing to hear πŸ™‚

      Like

  9. James Avatar

    Remembrance and loss. The prompt also spoke to me of death, but of a different kind.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Look forward to reading, thanks James

      Like

  10. StuHN Avatar

    Made me think of old friends no longer around. Sniff.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      That was the idea, fond memories and happier times.

      Like

  11. yarnspinnerr Avatar

    Touching and very well narrated.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  12. BriannaMarieWrites Avatar

    This entire piece was so touching and vivid. I enjoyed the contrast of the fountain in the beginning and end.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much BriannaMarie, much appreciated πŸ™‚

      Like

  13. pensitivity101 Avatar

    Another lovely, but sad, story Iain. Very moving.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Di

      Liked by 1 person

  14. notestowomen Avatar

    Beautiful story. I liked the way you introduced the different characters going about their daily lives and then the sad end–no more Henri. Very touching and moving piece. It was just bustling with life. I really, really enjoyed it reading it. Well done, Iain!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much, very kind.

      Like

  15. anuragbakhshi Avatar

    That was so powerfully written Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. Shivangi Avatar

    The ending made me so sad. Losing a sibling is traumatic. Great take!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Kate @ everywhere and nowhere Avatar

    Lovely but very sad πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Kate

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Ellespeth Avatar

    You’ve nicely woven past and present in this sad piece.

    I see what you mean…we took a similar path with this prompt.

    Ellespeth

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Jennie Avatar

    Powerful, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Jennie Avatar

        You’re welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

  20. Sarah Ann Avatar
    Sarah Ann

    Tender and poignant, with a great change from the uplifting play of children to the sadness of the brothers’ parting. Really well done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you πŸ™‚

      Like

  21. Anita Avatar

    Oh! Sad one.
    Very moving.
    Absence of siblings is very sad.
    Have a great week.
    – Anita

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Anita

      Like

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