SO CLOSE AND YET SO FAR

The pot of gold at the end of the rainbow was right there.

But everytime she tried to grab it, something blocked her, like a thin mesh she couldn’t penetrate, dulling her view of the world.

She would fall back and begin the long journey again, reaching up through the fog to the light.

A different medication, a different routine, anything to break the cycle.

She should be happy, her life was full. People tried to understand, it was a disease, an illness.

And so the battle goes. One day she would see the world in bright colour once more.


meep-by-the-window
Copyright Jean L. Hays

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

93 responses to “SO CLOSE AND YET SO FAR”

  1. Interesting take on the prompt, Iain

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Intense in its simplicity!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I hope that ‘one day’ comes very soon. This touched my heart, Iain. Very moving.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Edith, very kind and I’m glad it touched you.

      Like

    2. I agree. It was so “smoothly” written. Words flowed, sentences connected then the line about the meds.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. A disquieting piece this week, Iain, but nicely done.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Dear Iain,

    It’s a horrid disease that leaves the sufferer riddled with guilt and those around her confused and often angry. At least if you’re speaking of clinical depression. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 3 people

    1. That was the intention Rochelle, glad that it came through.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. You captured that fog of despair nicely, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Great story – very poignant and such an original take on a photo of a bird seen through a mesh window. Brilliantly done, Iain.

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Diseases are hard to cope with. Hope she gets well soon, the mesh disappears and everything is bright and clear.
    Well narrated.
    Note- I have medication in my story too 🙂
    Stranger Outside?- Anita

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Wow! You’ve really nailed it this week! What a poignant and powerful story about the sheer slog of trying to overcome depression. People around generally have no idea of just how tough it is. The pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is a great metaphor for the goal of recovery.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Penny, that means a lot 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  10. In my experience people who suffer from depression very rarely come across as downbeat or miserable. Yet it is such an awful blank sense of pointlessness.. I am sure anyone who fights the daily battle to manage it will appreciate the imaginative concept in your writing.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you Jilly, as I am not a sufferer, I do hope it comes across as a realistic representation.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. There but for the grace of God etc. Simply brilliant Iain

    Liked by 1 person

  12. This one really appeals to my therapist’s heart, Lain. Beautifully written.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. A very clever take on the prompt Iain. It hit home.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. How tragic, Iain. In your usual style who told this story so well and I can certainly think of someone close to me who this sadly describes too well. It is tempting to wrap them up in a warm blanket and protect them, when getting back out there again is ultimately the best thing for them.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much Rowena

      Like

  15. Excellent evocative piece, Iain. I’m glad to see you branching away from spy/action/violence. This is my favorite of yours so far.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, high praise indeed, much appreciated.

      Like

  16. Spare, and absolutely spot-on.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I also noticed the hazy effect that the screen had on the images beyond it. Nice how you ran with that effect!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, I was at a loss so I just kinda ignored the bird! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Evocative and timely.
    Wonderful message.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. A very powerful take on someone suffering from depression. I know a few people who struggle with mental illness, wanting to live medication free lives. It’s a very sad reality for many who feel like they are living in a haze and longing to break free. Well done, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. I imagine depression to feel exactly like that… a veil between yourself and the prospects of living.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. I love this piece. It’s about such an important topic and it’s written with great honesty.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Lisa, much appreciated

      Liked by 1 person

  22. A topic which is close to my heart, well handled.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. a timely topic considering news about iconic figures that we lost recently. well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Another powerful and oh-so-relevant tale.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. I see a little bit of hope, she hasn’t given up. Nice take with the curtain to show us how she sees life.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, there is always that little bit of hope.

      Liked by 1 person

  26. A sad reflection on our pill addicted world, well told.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. I loved your use of the screen as “like a thin mesh she couldn’t penetrate, dulling her view of the world.” A timely story, and a poignant look into the life of someone who suffers silently.

    Liked by 2 people

  28. The state of depression well-described.

    Like

  29. As you can see by all the likes I’ve submitted, I agree with pretty much everything everyone else has said. A very well done piece, Ian.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Alicia.

      Liked by 1 person

  30. Oops, sorry I spelled your name wrong! Shoot, no way to go back.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha, at least you spotted it, as you can imagine this has happened throughout my entire life! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Been there. Everyone mispronounces my name. It’s intended to be pronounced as if it were spelled Alisha, not Aleesha which is popular now. I just shrug and answer. (My nickname is Lish which people still pronounce Leesh.) Sorry, I’m rambling.

        Liked by 1 person

  31. This is so powerful, and beautifully written. Depression can affect everyone at any time, no one is immune. I love, and applaud the narrator’s willingness to accept help and get better.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Gabi

      Like

  32. Heartbreaking… and yet, she doesn’t give up which is uplifting.
    Beautifully done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Dale

      Liked by 1 person

  33. I liked your story very much. In such a compassionate way it captures what it is like to be depressed, in a way that includes hopefulness. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  34. Wow, very tight and intense writing Iain. Her pain and desperation is palpable

    Liked by 1 person

  35. A vivid picture of depression.

    Liked by 1 person

  36. I’ve known people who suffered from depression. You captured their despair brilliantly.

    Liked by 1 person

  37. An incredible take on the prompt. Living life one gray day at a time, longing to experience the joy and color of it, is extremely difficult for many. Your story is very moving.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Brenda, very kind comment.

      Liked by 1 person

  38. There is so much meaning here in such a small space. Great job!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Pamela 🙂

      Like

  39. You’ve done a brilliant job of making this both saddening and incredibly hopeful – really nicely done in just 100 words.

    Liked by 1 person

  40. Clever job Iain. That use of the screen as a metaphor for mental illness was a brilliant idea – so close and yet so far from ‘normality’. Great Stuff

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Lynn, much appreciated.

      Like

  41. A wonderfully affecting description for the journey through depression. You have summed so well the ups and downs, and how frustrating and disheartening it must feel to never reach the elusive gold.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Sarah Ann

      Like

  42. Very nicely done. You’ve described the complex emotions with accuracy and also with sensitivity.
    The hope comes through what could have been a very dark piece.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, much appreciated.

      Like

  43. I love what you’ve done here. You’ve described what I interpret as depression quite well, somewhat poetically, and it is probably just me, but I wonder if the piece wouldn’t be stronger without indicating that she would see color once more. I do understand you’re trying to make the piece hopeful, however. Just a thought…maybe a bad one. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the suggestion Sascha, but yes, I wanted to leave on a moment of hope, which I hope those who suffer from depression do hold on to.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. suffering from depression is a lot like living with blinders on from one day to the next, but I do like the hope in your story. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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