IAIN KELLY

SACRIFICE TO THE GODS

‘Run through the checklist.’

‘Okay. The ceremony must take place in a grand altar.’

They look round the baroque dome and nod at each other.

‘Check.’

‘Six golden urns placed in a circle atop six poles.’

‘Check.’

‘Attire of purple cloaks to worship royalty and their wealth.’

They look sheepishly at the garish cloaks they wear.

‘Check.’

‘A dais with a plain altar in the centre.’

‘Check.’

‘Ropes and/or chains suitable for restraints.’

‘Check.’

‘Daggers.’

‘Check.’

‘I think that’s everything.

Pause. He turns the paper over.

‘Hold on, there’s something on the back here. A naked, voluptuous virgin with flowing golden locks.’

‘Ah…’


rogers-skylight
Copyright Roger Bultot

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

103 responses to “SACRIFICE TO THE GODS”

  1. neilmacdon Avatar

    That made me smile

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Then I call that a success.

      Like

  2. may hem Avatar
    may hem

    I almost expected “and their heads turned to Sally, the golden retreiver”

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Well, maybe they will resort to that, but is Sally a virgin?! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. may hem Avatar
        may hem

        the golden retriever ‘pup’?

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Reena Saxena Avatar

    Sinister, with fatal instincts!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      And incompetence! Thanks Reena

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Jennifer Kennedy Avatar

    Haha! Fantastic.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Jennifer 🙂

      Like

  5. neeltheauthor- author of WHEN LIFE THROWS THOSE CURVE BALLS Avatar

    There is something foreboding about this story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Foreboding, yet also farcical, perhaps?

      Like

  6. pensitivity101 Avatar

    Funny Iain. Some people are in such a hurry, they don’t read the whole thing first!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Always read the instructions (I never do!)

      Like

      1. pensitivity101 Avatar

        or the small print. I wonder how many people in years to come will not understand the significance of PTO!

        Liked by 1 person

  7. Rowena Avatar

    What about the brunette? More chance of a virgin?
    Well done.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Ha! Well, I wouldn’t like to make that assumption! 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Rowena Avatar

        Thought I’d stir the pot a bit.

        Liked by 1 person

    2. ceayr Avatar

      Laughing. Flipping Sheila, get yourself under control, woman, and stop trashing all the other ladies!

      Liked by 2 people

  8. StuHN Avatar

    Ah…the virgin. Good luck, O Evil Harvesters Cult. This made me laugh, thanks Iain. It’s a good thing they made their lists. So many places (looking at you, NYC DOE) would work so much better if they checked off the appropriate boxes.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I live by lists. Glad you liked it Stu

      Like

  9. J Hardy Carroll Avatar

    Good to have a checklist. Wouldn’t want to go to all that trouble and not have it work. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. granonine Avatar

    If they needed a recipe for their program, it sounds like maybe THEY were the “virgins” 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Ha, definitely ‘beginners’! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Susan A Eames Avatar

    Ha ha – always remember to turn over the page! Duh. Nice one, Iain.

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Sound advice. Thanks Susan 🙂

      Like

  12. ceayr Avatar

    Personally I would have skipped the chains and daggers and gone straight for the blonde, but what do I know…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Certainly the sacrifice would’ve been more fun if only the daggers were missing, not the virgin.

      Like

  13. willowdot21 Avatar

    Don’t you just hate it when the most important thing on the list is in the P.T.O. section and gets over looked!? 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Especially when they’ve gone to such an effort to get everything just right! 🙂

      Like

      1. willowdot21 Avatar

        Indeed 😁😀💜

        Liked by 1 person

  14. larry trasciatti Avatar

    I’m not sure whether it depicts something real, a play , or what?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Is there a difference between a play and a religious ceremony, or are they both filled with actors on stage?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. larry trasciatti Avatar

        They have certain things in common

        Liked by 1 person

  15. Darnell Cureton Avatar

    Oh those last minute details….lol

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yep, always one detail that gets missed!

      Like

  16. JoHawkTheWriter Avatar

    Details, details, details. Wonder if they will find an appropriate virgin in time for the ceremony Nicely done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It’s an awkward question to ask a passer by with blonde hair! 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. JoHawkTheWriter Avatar

        Ah, I see the problem. Most successful human sacrifice ritual party planners don’t ask. 😈

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Iain Kelly Avatar

        Haha, now that would be an interesting career!

        Liked by 1 person

  17. Alicia Jamtaas Avatar

    Ah, the best-laid plans often fail. (At least in my world.) Thanks for the smile.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      You’re very welcome 🙂

      Like

  18. Dale Avatar

    That did crack a smile from me… All that checking and then… of COURSE it has to be a virginal blonde…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Glad it gave you a smile Dale 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Dale Avatar

        That you did, Iain!

        Liked by 1 person

  19. jillyfunnell Avatar

    Filename: Sacrifice, Checklist For The Use Of During needs a retype and reissue. PS As very possibly the most hair-obsessed among the FFs, does said virgin have to be a natural blonde? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I’ll have to check, I think it’s preferred but not essential if said virgin is desperate to be involved 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  20. plaridel Avatar

    i wonder who could she be? curious mind wants to know. i hope it’s just a stage play, though . 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Do you know of any volunteers? 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  21. subroto Avatar

    Sheesh! This is the last time I am letting the work experience guys organise a human sacrifice.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Well, if you want a job doing properly…

      Like

  22. rochellewisoff Avatar

    Dear Iain,

    Sometimes the most careful planning can go awry. LOL

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Rochelle

      Like

  23. Abhijit Ray Avatar
    Abhijit Ray

    Great story. I love the checklist.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you so much

      Like

  24. Varad Avatar

    why do they always need a virgin!? This was a lot of fun, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Varad

      Like

  25. draliman Avatar

    Ha, I don’t think this bunch are going to have much luck getting one of those. Reminds me of that awful moment in the exam where you’ve been relaxing for 20 minutes thinking you’re finished, then you turn the paper over…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I think they may have to reschedule. Maybe put an advert in the paper…

      Liked by 1 person

  26. anuragbakhshi Avatar

    Only a minor ‘ingredient’ seems to be left now 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Are they easy to track down? 😉

      Like

  27. Piyali Avatar

    Oh, some religious ritual scene you’ve created there! Sinister!

    Liked by 1 person

  28. talesfromthemindofkristian Avatar

    The ecclesiastical turned satanic 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Although having a few issues with it 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  29. James McEwan Avatar

    It is the detail that matters: now where are they going to get a virgin with golden locks?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      There’s usually a few hanging around a cathedral late at night, just in case. Right?

      Liked by 1 person

  30. 4963andypop Avatar

    Thats a good chuckle. Our best hope against the success of kooks lies in their own incompetence.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I couldn’t agree more! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  31. liz young Avatar

    Great reveal, Iain!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Liz

      Like

  32. Brenda's Thoughts Avatar

    I can picture the bumbling group of worshippers going through the checklist, then gawking at each other when discovering the key ingredient on the back of the page. Very amusing! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Brenda, glad you enjoyed 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  33. pennygadd51 Avatar

    Teehee! Voluptuous, blonde and a virgin? They’re not asking for much, are they?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      These rituals are very demanding 🙂

      Like

  34. Jacob C. Edwards Avatar

    Hahaha voluptuous, blonde virgins are definitely harder to come by. Great story man, I really dug the lighthearted feel to something that if you think about it is pretty damn dark haha.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, just what I hoped the reader would feel 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  35. Laurie Bell Avatar

    Lol pair of geniuses here. Funny piece this week

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Laurie

      Like

  36. i b arora Avatar

    the story had to end like that

    Liked by 1 person

  37. Keith's Ramblings Avatar

    Checkmate! Nicely done Iain

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Keith

      Liked by 1 person

  38. Russell Gayer Avatar

    Hold on a minute. I’ll run down to Vigin Outlet and pick one up. If we can get a brunette for half price, will that be okay?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It does specify blonde, and we don’t want to upset the Gods…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Russell Gayer Avatar

        No, it doesn’t pay to irritate the Gods. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  39. the dark netizen Avatar

    Hahahaha! XD
    Ooo boy..another funny bomb from you!
    Nice! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, glad you liked it 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  40. lisarey1990 Avatar

    Great ending!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Lisa 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  41. Russell Avatar

    Just one more thing! Isn’t that always the case.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Always the essential thing too!

      Liked by 1 person

  42. Björn Rudberg (brudberg) Avatar

    I think it’s dawning on what the ceremony is all about…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      And they don’t seem prepared at all…

      Like

  43. magarisa Avatar

    I’m guessing the ceremony will be postponed for quite some time, as voluptuous virgins with golden locks are harder to find than a needle in a haystack. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Certainly for these two I suspect!

      Liked by 1 person

  44. theministryofshrawleywalks Avatar

    Will they be too late to find a voluptuous blonde virgin??

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I think they maybe out of luck.

      Liked by 1 person

  45. Fatima Fakier Avatar

    I’d like to see how they fulfil that requirement. Probably end up with red cheeks from all the slapping. Nice one, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It will be a challenge, I’m not sure they are up to it!

      Like

  46. Dawn M. Miller Avatar

    Got a snicker out of me 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      🙂 Pleased it raised a smile Dawn

      Liked by 1 person

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