IAIN KELLY

STOP THE BOATS

The Home Secretary sat down to her meal in the grand hotel ballroom.

The day had gone well. ‘STOP THE BOATS’: the perfect slogan to win back their core voters.

Some of those irritating lawyers and activists and soft left-y socialists had bleated on about the European Convention of Human Rights, and breaking international law, but they’d been shouted down in the Twitter storm of sycophants and bots.

Getting out of the ECHR would come later. Then she could really deal with those bloody immigrants.

She waited. No food came.

A hotel manager appeared. ‘Very sorry, Home Secretary. I’m afraid there are no staff to wait the tables. You see, you’ve sent them all back to their countries of origin.’

Copyright Jennifer Pendergast

Written for Friday Fictioneers hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read more stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

Apologies for a bit of a despairing moan about the language and legislation that this Tory UK government have deployed this week, as we stumble ever onwards towards xenophobia and fascism in the UK.

‘The State Trilogy’ and ‘The Barra Boy’ available now.

70 responses to “STOP THE BOATS”

  1. OIKOS™- Art, Books & more Avatar

    Wonderful, Iain! Best wishes, Michael

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Michael

      Liked by 1 person

      1. OIKOS™- Art, Books & more Avatar

        You’re welcome, Iain! xx Michael

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Yamini Ali MacLean Avatar

    Hari OM
    Bravo, right on topic!!! YAM xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you – if only it wasn’t a topic…!

      Like

  3. neilmacdon Avatar

    Oh the irony! I think they’ll have to cut back next on over-generous benefits to drive the servants back to work

    Like

  4. trentpmcd Avatar

    Yep, only here it would be “because there was nobody to harvest the food”…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yep, we have that one too!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. rochellewisoff Avatar

    Dear Iain,

    Now there’s a way to drive the message home. Bon apetit, Secretary.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Liz H Avatar

      Nothing speaks louder to a self-righteous Redneck than a growling stomach! Yes!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Iain Kelly Avatar

        If only it would bring about a change of direction, alas not from our current rulers.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Liz H Avatar

        I’ve always thought Grassroots activism is more effective for culture change…

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Iain Kelly Avatar

        I wish I could see it bringing about change more, and quicker.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Liz H Avatar

        Yah, I get that.

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Rochelle – if only there was a way to make this government listen and think a little more compassionately.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. elmowrites Avatar

    Ah, Britain. The trouble with a country founded so deeply in thinking its better than others, is how do you translate that to an increasingly connected international community? It’s elements like this that make me glad to have moved away.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yes, your well out of it. I can only dream that my part (Scotland) which does feel like a different place entirely from the south of England, will one day break free.

      Like

  7. scr4pl80 Avatar

    LOL serves her right.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Exactly. I could wish a lot worse on her, but this’ll do for now!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Liz Young Avatar

    As you’re being political, how many of those Albanian young men in the boats end up actually working? Proper immigrants contribute to the economy, or would do if illegal ones didn’t clog up the system by jumping the queue.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I have no idea, do you? Not doubting there is a problem that needs sorted with the small boat crossings. But a solution that rips up human rights, throws refugees and asylum seekers into a jail for 28 days and automatically deports them without them having any rights or recourse to legal advice or guidance is beyond cruel. Breaking international law and criminalising vulnerable people is not a good look. It is one of the biggest gaps between how England seems to react as a society compared to Scotland, and I wish I could distance myself from this government entirely. Not in my name, as they say. On the flip side, Britain takes less refugees than many countries in Europe, and has few legal avenues for genuine asylum seekers to get here. Any defence of this latest abhorrent policy is deeply misguided. Gary Lineker is correct – the language being used is reminiscent of 1930s Germany, and that is surely not a comparison we wish, or a place we want to be heading towards.

      Like

  9. CGraith Avatar

    Ha! Ha! Isn’t that a reality that repeats over and over in society? The people who make the luxuries happen are the least recognized until they’re not there any more.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yes, if only people could see that before we end up in difficulty!

      Like

  10. msjadeli Avatar

    Sounds perfectly horrid, Iain. I watched John Oliver last night do a feature on Ron DeSantis, who is probably going to run for POTUS in 2024 and how as governor he’s turned the state of FL into is own personal fascist state. Fun times on the horizon. I loved this line: “they’d been shouted down in the Twitter storm of sycophants and bots.”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yes, it’s depressing beyond words really. I hope the US doesn’t veer back to the right after the Trump years. I’m hoping our Tory government will be gone by the time we have our next election in 18 months, but it wouldn’t surprise me if they are voted in again.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. msjadeli Avatar

        I know what you mean. If the Magates get in in 2024 things are going to get real scary.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Iain Kelly Avatar

        Brace yourself!

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Dale Avatar

    Hah! Serves her right. It is a sad state of affairs. We need immigration, yet we don’t want too much of it. Or, we want the “right” kind.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      We do seem to want to choose which vulnerable people we would prefer to help.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Dale Avatar

        Ain’t that the truth…

        Liked by 1 person

  12. writerravenclaw Avatar

    Brilliant, she lost out there.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, if only it could be true!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. joyroses13 Avatar

    Perfect ending!
    And I am very happy to say that I am at last enjoying reading your latest book, The Barra Boy. Intriguing! I am guessing at how it turns out, will see if I am right. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Fabulous, hope you enjoy it. Do leave a review somewhere to let me know!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. joyroses13 Avatar

        I definitely will! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  14. Keith's Ramblings Avatar

    A topical tale indeed. Living as I do on the south coast of England where the small boats are coming ashore, it’s always interesting to read others’ thoughts on the subject. Dale is spot on when she says we want the right kind of immigration.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Keith. No argument that something needs to be done, but breaking international law on human rights can’t be the way to go about it.

      Like

  15. Tracey at Whatsfordinnerdoc.com and TraceyDelaplainMD.com Avatar

    It’s the same here in the U.S. unfortunately. Many are ok with using immigrants but they aren’t welcome at the table.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Very much that Tracey. It seems to be everywhere now.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. neeltheauthor- author of WHEN LIFE THROWS THOSE CURVE BALLS Avatar

    Doing lip service to socialism while lusting after a champagne life! Good story, Ian.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  17. Alicia Jamtaas Avatar

    Boom! And I wonder if, without immigrants, her gardens will be well kept. Be careful what you wish for.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Alicia. It’s dog whistle politics at its very worst.

      Like

  18. Laurie Bell Avatar

    And yet, I don’t think it will wake her up and will change her evil mind. Nicely done.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Unfortunately not, maybe a change of government is what’s needed instead.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Nobbinmaug Avatar

    It’s more ironic over here. Where I’m sitting used to be Mexico, and people want to pretend like we’re the immigrants.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It’s complicated everywhere, and mostly lacking in basic humanity.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. plaridel Avatar

    i guess one never realizes the value of something until it’s gone.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Unfortunately so.

      Like

  21. Dawn M. Miller Avatar
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  22. poetisatinta Avatar

    Love how you picked up on our current political agenda Iain 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  23. athling2001 Avatar

    Be careful what you wish for! Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Tannille Avatar

    Another option is to pay decent wages so people want to serve. They use to be “stepping” jobs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yes, in general just treat people better.

      Liked by 1 person

  25. susanrouchard Avatar

    So true to life Ian. Thanks for the laugh….Didn’t see that coming.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Susan. You have to laugh!

      Liked by 1 person

  26. Liam Avatar

    The perfect comeuppance.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  27. authorfleurl Avatar

    That’ll teach him! Just desserts…nicely done, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. Brenda's Thoughts Avatar

    I despair at the extremes. Where is the compassion? Nicely done, Iain!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Brenda

      Like

  29. britcanwrites Avatar

    😳 nice! She’d better get up and serve herself some humble pie. 😁

    Liked by 1 person

  30. Bill Avatar

    The governors of Texas and Florida have worked out a US solution. Use tax money to lease busses and give them free rides to other states. LOL Only ten million more bus loads and problem solved (he said sarcastically).

    Wonderful, Iain. The pot was well-stirred. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Yes, we have similar – planes to Rwanda – although none have left yet as it’s still in the courts.

      Liked by 1 person

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