BEST FORGOTTEN

Lillian stared at the incongruous door.

Why had it been added to the old stone entrance? Why the rusty chain in front of it?

She ran back to her father.

‘If there is a door, why does there need to be a chain?’ she asked.

Her father looked down at her.

‘So that no one gets too close to the door.’

‘Why can’t you get too close to the door?’

‘Because then you may be tempted to open the door.’

‘But what’s behind the door?’

Her father sighed. ‘Something best forgotten.’

‘You mean like my mother?’ Lillian looked up.

‘Exactly, like your mother,’ he replied.


ceayr-purple-door
© CE Ayr

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read more stories based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

84 responses to “BEST FORGOTTEN”

  1. A crypt! I saw the same thing in the image. A prettily chilling story, Iain

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Neil, it does have that quality to it – I think a lot of the stories might head this way!

      Like

      1. Rochelle always says she can predict each week what the main meme will be

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Oh my, didn’t expect the conversation to end up like that. Nice!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, not sure I expected it to go that way either, but that’s where it went! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Dear Iain,

    That took an interesting turn at the end. Not sure it that was her mother’s crypt or just a reference to a less than desirable mum. And yes, by about the fifth story (sometimes tenth) I can predict where the stories will go. 4 years of experience. 😉 I also love to proven wrong.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The placing of the comma in the last line could be significant as to how you interpret father’s answer… Hope we’re not too predictable for you this week 🙂

      Like

  4. I love it when the direction of a story hangs on a nuance. Excellent one!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Sandra, glad you liked it.

      Like

  5. Well done, as usual. Your lines are as neat as your thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I think dad is still lying.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think dad has a lot he’s not telling 🙂

      Like

  7. Oh that’s a bit harsh! I am very eager to know more about this family.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Something dark in the past definitely. Many thanks 🙂

      Like

  8. Great story as always Iain

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I really enjoy how you get so much into a short and then there’s the brill ending.

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Laughing.
    I love this, especially that comma!

    Like

  10. Love this Iain! The dialogue btween the two is spot on and that last, killer line – cracking! Mum must have really been something else. You’ve got me intrigued and now I’d quite like to meet her 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Lynn, I shall have to fill in some back story 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Ouch. That one hurt. Great job.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, definitely a nasty one!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. That’s eerie. I had a similar idea but couldn’t make it work like you have so went in another direction. Great writing

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Michael. It seemed a bit obvious to have a murder/body behind the door but I think I managed to spin it enough to make it fresh.

      Like

  13. Oh dear… that comma changes everything… and now we all have questions! Great job, Iain

    Like

  14. Well done and ouch, what’s the story with the mother – she must have been some character.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sure she was! Many thanks 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Clever last words Ian, Very good writing. Won’t she be shocked if she ever finds out when she’s older.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. She will be, is it better that she never finds out? Thanks for reading 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  16. That was bittersweet, great job 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  17. There is something sinister about a door with an extra chain… indeed dark

    Like

  18. If I was that kid, I’d try to get in there. Secrets like this are too tempting. I think you lead us around by the nose with this one, and there’s only frilly dresses and mum’s collection of barbie dolls in there. Great writing, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Indeed, it could all be very innocent…, or not 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  19. I certainly wasn’t expecting that ending and by now, I know there is likely to be a shocking twist! I love the ambiguity of the last line. The difference a comma can make! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly, I know where I have him put his emphasis in the last line, but I like to leave it up to you how you want to take it! Many thanks Clare 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Oh dear, I didn’t see that coming. Great take on the prompt.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Clearly, there are a couple of ways to interpret this, good and not so good . I can’t help but think that the first conclusion you come to says a lot about yourself!

    My story is called Sally’s Secret

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks Keith, yes I think I can guess which way most of us writers interpret the last line!

      Like

  22. Eek, remove that comma in the last sentence and things suddenly look a whole lot darker…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think the comma may be covering a dark secret indeed 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  23. i guess it contains her mom’s belongings who left them for another man.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nice theory, a lot lighter than whatost people seem to be imagining! Many thanks for reading and commenting.

      Liked by 1 person

  24. Ooooo we had similar ideas here Iain but yours is far more chilling

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Laurie, it could be chilling, it could be completely innocent, I’ll let you decide 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  25. I think the daughter suspected something and just led her dad up to confessing it 😀 Enjoyed the story very much Iain 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ah, maybe, smart kid 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  26. Family secrets are always the best. I enjoyed your take on the prompt and the comments. I have a friend who has a similar view about his ex-wife and she’s not dead. It’s hard when you split up with someone and then have that ongoing contact through the kids when you’d just like to move on.
    xx Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Very true Rowena, my parents are separated and it’s tricky enough for the children to deal with, sometimes forget that it must be difficult for the adults too. Thanks for your kind comment.

      Like

  27. I didn’t think the wife was buried behind the locked door. I took it more at face value that some things are better. I feel for the little girl who doesn’t and shouldn’t have to understand what happened.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You seem to be in the minority, most comments seem to be going the darker option 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  28. I actually had the same questions about the chain in front of the door as the girl in your story, so I feel better having asked them vicariously through her. Not so sure that the answer about her mother is reassuring though. 🙂 Nice twist!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Joy, it’s the obvious question isn’t it? Glad you liked the twist 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I had the chain in my story initially but had to cut it for length reasons. My narrator assumed it was a magic lock trap, and expected to be zapped when he touched it. When he wasn’t, he laughed at how silly it was to put a chain there as he easily stepped over it.

        Liked by 2 people

  29. Great story. Makes me curious (and cautious) about the mother.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Many thanks for your kind comment. I’m not sure it ended well for the mother 🙂

      Like

  30. spero che dietro la porta ci sia un mondo migliore
    bella interpretazione del tema!
    🙂 Annalisa

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lo spero anch’io, molte grazie Annalisa 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  31. Even if her mother’s not there, and I assume she is, it’s an bad turn of events. Yikes. Poor kid. Nicely done, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Not the end I was expecting.
    I could feel the fathers pain at the questions.
    Great story!

    Liked by 1 person

  33. When one wants to keep something secret, looks fishy. Nicely written. I liked the style.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, he’s definitely hiding something! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the reblog 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Certainly the mysteries of his wife anyway. Many thanks 🙂

      Like

  34. Enticingly mysterious. The child’s curiosity and the father’s enigmatic response are fascinating.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Margaret. It could all be perfectly innocent, or maybe not 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  35. Wow, Iain, there have to be layers below that answer. Good writing. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Like

  36. My guess would have been the child’s grandmother (his pesky mother in-law) was behind the door. Ha! Good story, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s a different theory – and one I can understand! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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