The bugle sounded, the flag was lowered. Feet shuffled on gravel.
The silence was broken by the diesel engine of a barge. They didn’t close the canal anymore.
Some her mother had nursed back to full health, some never recovered. One her mother married.
Twenty years later she was alongside her mother as men repeated the same mistakes. She remembered the faces, the blood, the screams. The cost of war.
She was the last of them, the nurses of the Hôpital Temporaire d’Arc-en-Barrois.
Would anyone remember those men once she was gone?
The barge carried on along the canal.
Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).
To read stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.
Beautiful and haunting, Iain
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Thank you Neil.
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neil had the two words I was feeling – beauitful and haunting…
I also loved the bit of meter in the flow here –
would make a great read aloud…
slowing down with
” She remembered the faces
the blood
the screams.”
long pause – and look around
and quietly saying:
“The cost of war.”
so good!!
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Thank you so much, appreciate the detailed comment 🙂
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🙂
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Lest we forget. Hopefully, they will be remembered as will she. Excellent Iain.
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Thank you Keith.
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Intriguing piece. I like the language.
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Thank you.
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Dear Iain,
Tragically well written.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you Rochelle.
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Lovely story Iain. Yours is a historical fiction too. I think you should add this link to the hospital’s name https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/H%C3%B4pital_Temporaire_d%27Arc-en-Barrois
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Thank you – I did read the same link, but didn’t want to link to it as I’m not sure it is the exact same place, but now you have provided the information 🙂
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Superb piece of writing, Iain.
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Thank you CE.
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So it really was a hospital? Good story, Iain. The true tragedy of war is that it is forgotten, or glamorised and sugar-coated.
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It had that look to me so I went with it. I agree, feels like we have completely forgotten the tragedy of it at the moment.
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The commemoration industry has taken over, seems to me.
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Gripping and tragic, well done.
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Thank you so much.
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We run in circles and repeat our mistakes. Well written.
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Thank you Lori
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Very well written and thought out. I really loved it and found it very touching.
xx Rowena
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Thank you Rowena, very kind, glad you liked it.
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Very nicely done. I could almost hear that barge.
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I imagine you were steering it down the canal Sandra 🙂
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There’s great ambience feeling to this. You express such sorrow well, along with this hopeless dream that no one will forget those sacrifice in war; we always do at some time. Great piece!
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Thank you, it feels like we have forgotten it at the moment for sure.
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Wow. The same mistakes repeated again and again. What sorrow. Great writing!!
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Thank you so much 🙂
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I love the writing in your story. It’s simple, clean, elegant. Absolutely direct and to the point, choosing such good little incidents to convey the atmosphere. The barge was a particularly good touch.
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Thank you Penny, so pleased you appreciated it.
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Beautiful tone in this tale, Iain. Nice piece of historical fiction.
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Thank you Varad.
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lain, I think this is now my favorite of your stories. Such a haunting sense of sadness, at the same time shwoing compassion. Really well done.
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Thank you so much, a very kind comment.
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So well written, Iain. Such a tragedy, beautifully told.
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Thank you Dale 🙂
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Iain, you have conveyed so much with just a few words. Very moving.
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Thank you Jilly.
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Oh, Iain. I love where you took this! I do believe it’s one of your best. My heart is breaking ~ just a little.
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Thank you so much Alicia, such a nice compliment.
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Love it—who will remember? it’s like those barges passing….
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Thank you Bjorn, that was the little connection I was trying to weave into the story, so glad you saw it.
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Ha.. being a poet I always spot the metaphor.
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🙂
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A beautiful memorial.. who will remember, indeed.
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Thank you.
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A moving story, Iain. So very well written. I love the powerful imagery of people passing by regardless, so cleverly personified in the indifferent movement of the barge.
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Thank you Edith, I’m glad you appreciated that image.
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In the long span of history, how many such barges have passed?
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An interesting thought, thank you ALice
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A beautiful story Iain. The cairns might make some wonder and find out but over time so much is forgotten.
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Thank you Irene.
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Brilliant, Iain. 🙂
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Thank you Moon.
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Such a powerful piece of historical fiction.
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Thank you very much.
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I liked how you made the connection to the wars. There was also a reminder of the futile idea that WW! was the war to end all wars.
I enjoyed reading this.
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Thanks James.
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A very grim tale, very nicely written.
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Thank you
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A good tale you spun here. War generates so many memories.
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Thank you Vivian
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My pleasure.
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For a few years I worked in a ‘former’ WWI hospital, built using wooden huts. Now that hospital and its memory are long gone. In years to come it may be completely forgotten. Your interesting story delivered memories. Thank you
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Thank you Michael, it’s important we don’t completely forget the places and the people from the past.
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A beautifully written story, written with a delicate and elegiac touch, so expressive. Well done.
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Thank you so much, a lovely comment.
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Ghosts of the past and the circle repeats. Great themes in this one Iain
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Thank you Laurie 🙂
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war does represent the best and the worst in mankind.
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BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN, KELLY.
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Thank you Neel
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Great the way you pack so much in. This has an overwhelming weight about it – the barge representing life going on, almost as a disrespect to those who have died. Definitely a story that lingers.
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Thank you so much, very kind.
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A moving take on the prompt. Traffic doesn’t stop on Armistice Day in London either.
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I’ve noticed over the years that less and less people stop what they are doing to observe the minutes silence.
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How very sad and how very sad that this is very true – a lot of people tend to forget about what they don’t experience first hand or learn through family members. Very nicely written 🙂
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Thank you so much.
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Lest we forget. I once observed a service at one of the WW2 cemeteries in France. A moving experience.
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I’m sure it would be. Thank you Patrick.
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Beautiful story.
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Lain, wow! An excellent gripping story.
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Thank you Dan, much appreciated.
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Beautiful tale of the cost of war, the love and respect of a woman for her mother and the passage of time. All in 100 words. Marvelous!
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Thank you Jan!
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History repeats itself as men never learn from their or other’s mistakes. very subtle language.
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Thank you, glad you appreciated it.
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I must agree with all who have left comments before me, Iian.
The build-up to the ending is superb. I enjoyed reading very much.
Isadora 😎
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Thank you so much Isadora, much appreciated.
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While most of us were writing about castles and princesses, here you come with another unexpected twist. Superb story telling as usual!
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Thank you so much.
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Beautifully done, Iain. This feels like one of your more thoughtful pieces.
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Thank you Sascha.
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Nicely crafted, Iain. A point of view we don’t often think about–or perhaps choose not to.
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Thank you – I think we choose not to imagine what a lot of people went through in those times. and still currently are around the world.
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Well written story Iain. I love that image of the canal barge, life plodding on regardless as men die in their millions. Wonderfully done
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Thank you Lynn
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My pleasure
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Beautiful piece of writing and a deep question which we may never be able to answer. I hope we never forget.
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Thank you so much
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A very beautiful story.
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Thank you
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