IAIN KELLY

THE ENEMY WITHIN

‘This is Mount Lemmon Observatory calling, is there anyone receiving?’

Only static hiss replied.

Marshall rubbed his sweat-stained forehead.

‘Can anyone update us? What has happened?’

The static noise stopped. Dead silence.

Marshall maneuvered the telescope with the controls. He tilted it down to face the horizon.

Outside he saw bare, dead trees and barren sandscapes.

He had spent his life gazing at the heavens, searching for signs of life and guarding against hostile projectiles.

Meanwhile the real threat to Earth had already been here, and now his search was for any sign of life on his own planet.


mt-lemmon-with-tree
Copyright Jan Wayne Fields

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

This April I am taking part in the A to Z Challenge once again. My theme is a collection of stories from around the countries of the European Union, and you can find them here: A TO Z CHALLENGE 2018

108 responses to “THE ENEMY WITHIN”

  1. James Avatar

    EM pulse? A severe enough solar flare would knock out communications, though people wouldn’t necessarily die.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Could be, unspecified at this moment until he learns more.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. rochellewisoff Avatar

    Dear Iain,

    A bleak tale that has me wondering what planet Marshall is from. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Rochelle

      Like

  3. Rowena Avatar

    Dear Iain,
    A real sense of mystery in this one. Intriguing.
    How are you going with the challenge? I’m writing to Leonardo Da Vinci today. It was a public holiday for ANZAC Day today so not very productive on the writing front. My husband had a dummy spit. Always happens during the A-Z Challenge. Wish you could get paid for going into this thing so I could better justify my efforts on the home front.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I agree, I keep getting told off from my kids to get off the computer! Almost there, I have written all but my last entry, so I think I shall make it to the end. Must pop over and read Da Vinci, I have always been fascinated by him and his work.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Rowena Avatar

        I have only managed to scratch the surface, I’m afraid but I’ll be working on these and taking more time. I do want to learn more about Leonardo, especially his curiosity. Definitely something in that. My daughter has always asked a lot of questions like that and I’ve just been grateful that I’ve had Google to help with the answers.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Iain Kelly Avatar

        Tried to leave a comment on your Da Vinci post but something seemed to go awry. I have visited Milan, Florence and the Louvre so have followed his life around a bit, endlessly fascinating, both his art, inventions and the man himself.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Rowena Avatar

        Thanks Iain.
        I’ll have to see what’s going on with my comments. That sounds a bit strange. I haven’t been to Milan, but my cousin is currently there on a cello scholarship. It would be great to head back to Europe but there’s a lot here in Australia yet to explore which I can do on my current budget.
        Best wishes,
        Rowena

        Liked by 1 person

  4. J Hardy Carroll Avatar

    Good story, Iain. ET Phone home!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. yarnspinnerr Avatar

    A sad ending. Nice take.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  6. granonine Avatar

    Lain, you have a since surprise for us every week 🙂 I wasn’t sure where this one was going at first, but it soon became clear. Great take on this prompt.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, good to know I can still find something original to say 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. kristin Avatar

    Yikes! Reminds me of War of the Worlds.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Kristin 🙂

      Like

  8. neilmacdon Avatar

    Good chiller, Iain. There may be signs of life, but is any of it intelligent?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Not from where I’m looking…

      Like

  9. Lynn Love Avatar

    He was always looking up when he should have been looking around him – a kind of analogy for many of us there, always looking around when what we really have is right here. Nice tale Iain

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Lynn, glad you saw the point I was trying to suggest. A few comments suggest something extra-terrestrial was involved, which I hadn’t intended!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Lynn Love Avatar

        I didn’t see little green men. Just human folly! My pleasure Iain

        Liked by 1 person

  10. pennygadd51 Avatar

    A timely allegory to remind us of the need to take care of our planet. The threats that could wipe out humanity are already present. We can see them if we open our eyes and our minds. But will we open our hearts and do anything effective about them?
    A great cautionary tale.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Penny – exactly, we already know the threats that might wipe us out, but are we doing enough to prevent it, and if not, why not?

      Like

  11. robbiesinspiration Avatar

    This hits very close to home, Iain. A great story.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Robbie

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Alicia Jamtaas Avatar

    I agree with Lynn. Sometimes we are so focused on one thing, we forget to see what is happening around us. Nicely told.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Alicia

      Like

  13. EagleAye Avatar

    I’m thinking we have met the enemy and he is us. Our biggest threat is ourselves. If only we can win that battle, everything else should be easy.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Wouldn’t it just. Apparently we’re quite a stubborn enemy though, and unwilling to change our ways.

      Like

  14. maxmumsonia Avatar

    How do you manage writing posts for 2 different challenge. You are amazing. Here I keep struggling every day post .

    #atozchallenge – Journey So Far

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I have to organise my time very carefully! Keep going, the end is in sight 🙂

      Like

  15. Michael Avatar
    Michael

    I sometime wonder, if over time those who inhabit planets destroy them, perhaps we are in danger of becoming the last in a very long line to do so..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It certainly seems to be our aim at the moment.

      Like

  16. Kwadwo Avatar

    A post-apocalyptic world. I’ve seen movies like that. Nicely done. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Susan A Eames Avatar

    Oh, I wasn’t expecting that! Great story, Iain.

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Susan.

      Like

  18. justjoyfulness Avatar

    The future looks bleak, doesn’t it? You captured very well the subtle desperation.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      There is still hope at the moment that we can turn it around.

      Like

  19. Irene Waters 19 Writer Memoirist Avatar

    I think this is something that has been at the back of our minds of late – and wonder how much the world will know when someone presses a button somewhere. This line says it all “Outside he saw bare, dead trees and barren sandscapes.” I wonder if he does come across life whether they will wish they had perished also.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      That’s true, who would want to live in a world like that? Thanks Irene.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Alice Audrey Avatar

    Entirely too realistic.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Alice.

      Like

  21. Dale Avatar

    I, too, became focused on the looking up instead of directly in front or down… Perfect description of today’s society…
    Scary thought.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Dale.

      Liked by 1 person

  22. anuragbakhshi Avatar

    I hope this does not turn out to be prescient Iain, the way things are going.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. plaridel Avatar

    i suppose that due to climate change, earthlings are forced to live underground to survive the extreme heat.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Could be one solution.

      Liked by 1 person

  24. draliman Avatar

    Could he be the last survivor, all alone on top of the mountain? A scary thought.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Would you want to be that person?

      Liked by 1 person

  25. jillyfunnell Avatar

    I too think the enemy is us. We make such brilliant progress and improvements alongside idiotic waste of resources and downwright cruelty. A good, thought-provoking story, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Jilly, we do so much good and then seem to self destruct…

      Liked by 1 person

  26. liz young Avatar

    We know the enemy – it is us. Well written.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Our own worst enemy.

      Like

  27. Jane Dougherty Avatar

    If it’s intelligent life forms he’s looking for, I suggest he go back to looking at the stars.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Don’t give up hope just yet Jane!

      Like

      1. Jane Dougherty Avatar

        Too late 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  28. subroto Avatar

    That last paragraph rings so true. Nice one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, how is your A – Z coming along?

      Like

      1. subroto Avatar

        So slow, too many distractions. Only reached ‘S’ (for slow).

        Liked by 1 person

  29. gahlearner Avatar
    gahlearner

    Looks like one was resistant to my super-virus after all. 😉 I like how you set his star-gazing in contrast to events around him. A good reminder not to forget about the bigger picture.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you, not sure he wants to be the lone survivor!

      Like

  30. Fluid Phrase Avatar

    Oh! Such a sad state of affairs…. Almost seems like a prediction. 😦

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Let’s hope not.

      Liked by 1 person

  31. AshleyDannie Avatar
    AshleyDannie

    Uh-oh! What was the threat?! Great job!
    -AshleyDannie-

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  32. Russell Gayer Avatar

    The destruction of the earth is a slow-train coming, but coming none the less. Tightly written.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Russell – we seem to be doing all we can to arrive early at our destination.

      Like

  33. Laurie Bell Avatar

    Sooooo good. Great story. One I hope doesn’t come to pass

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Laurie – me too!

      Liked by 1 person

  34. Sarah Ann Avatar
    Sarah Ann

    Bad things always happen when you’re looking the other way. You leave us wanting to know more about what happened to put Marshall intros position – a story to continue thinking about.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thanks Sarah Ann

      Like

  35. ceayr Avatar

    Another post-apocalyptic dystopia. You are full of the joys of spring here, Iain!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It’s looking sunnier here today, if it holds until next week I’ll do a happy story…but this is the west coast of Scotland.

      Like

  36. Björn Rudberg (brudberg) Avatar

    All alone… happening while you’re busy looking elsewhere… chilling.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      It’s not a nice place to be.

      Like

  37. Jelli Avatar
    Jelli

    This could be an all too real scenario you’ve set up for us this week. Definitely a scary prospect… in many realms. Great write!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Jelli.

      Like

  38. lisarey1990 Avatar

    Gorgeously mysterious.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Lisa 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  39. Nan Falkner Avatar

    Great story – scary and sad. Hope this is just a dream.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  40. Vivian Zems Avatar

    What a scary position to be in!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      You don’t fancy it?

      Like

  41. James McEwan Avatar

    A fantastic reminder, that what we have should not be taken for granted.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Absolutely, thanks James

      Liked by 1 person

  42. michaelwynnauthor Avatar

    So often we are so focused on the distant we neglect to notice what’s happening on our doorstep

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Not seeing the wood for the trees is a popular pastime.

      Liked by 1 person

  43. Brenda's Thoughts Avatar

    An excellent, chilling story! Watching the heavens, “guarding against hostile projectiles”, forgetting the place he was to protect. =)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Exactly, and the threats closer to home. Thanks Brenda

      Liked by 1 person

  44. Fatima Fakier Avatar

    I like how the story suggests we focus more on saving our planet instead of flying to Mars and starting colonies on other planets.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      I would be good if we got our own house in order first, wouldn’t it!? Thanks Fatima

      Like

      1. Fatima Fakier Avatar

        Only makes sense 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  45. Susan Avatar

    I suppose it is human nature to worry more about the improbably than our own messes. Well done, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      Thank you Susan

      Liked by 1 person

  46. The Reclining Gentleman Avatar

    I like where you went with the pic; a timely warning of the damage the human race have managed to inflict on the planet

    Liked by 1 person

  47. magarisa Avatar

    Oh, the irony! Great use of suspense. I wonder what will become of him.

    Liked by 1 person

  48. athling2001 Avatar

    How sad that he missed it all. Well, not sad that he didn’t die, but that he didn’t have a chance to maybe help the human race survive.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar

      If there are any other survivors, perhaps he will still get that chance!

      Like

  49. Dawn M. Miller Avatar

    The irony is …well, ironic.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
  50. LONE WOLF – Iain Kelly Avatar

    […] story, but the prompt photo fitted neatly into a continuation. You can read the first part here: THE ENEMY WITHIN, or enjoy it as a stand alone story in its own […]

    Liked by 1 person

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