Iain Kelly

Fiction Writing

THE UNIVERSAL

Twilight feel, artificial light, woozy head. Almost home, such a nice night. Drinks, laughs, good times. Shared smiles with him again, dancing, brief contact. Should’ve made that move? A cloud of a missed opportunity. Park bench, take a seat, lie down. Staring up at the stars, the whole universe out there. Nothing to do in the day ahead. The future can wait. Enjoy the moment. Warm sun rays arrive, glinting, obscuring. His face appears above me. Can he join me? He lies on the bench next to me. Arms brush together. I smile. The rest of the universe can wait.

dales-field
Copyright Dale Rogerson

Written as part of the Friday Fictioneers challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields (more details HERE). The idea is to write a short story of 100 words based on the photo prompt (above).

To read stories of 100 words based on this week’s prompt, visit HERE.

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Iain Kelly

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75 responses to “THE UNIVERSAL”

  1. Tannille Avatar
    Tannille

    This is different coming from you. I expected a murder or something. Sweet, made me smile. No knife under the bench right? 😀

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Not this time, sometimes love is all you need 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Tannille Avatar
        Tannille

        You should write a song 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  2. neilmacdon Avatar
    neilmacdon

    What Tannille said. Sweet and unexpected, Iain

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Neil

      Like

      Reply
  3. joyroses13 Avatar
    joyroses13

    Awh! This was a warm fuzzy story, I was expecting something to jump out from under the bench. LOL! Good job. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Not this time, got to keep you on your toes 😉

      Like

      Reply
      1. joyroses13 Avatar
        joyroses13

        Haha! Yeah, when I am ready for it , it doesn’t happen!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. J Hardy Carroll Avatar
    J Hardy Carroll

    Very nice vignette

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you

      Like

      Reply
  5. Keith's Ramblings Avatar
    Keith’s Ramblings

    So, you do have a softer side! Or did you just run out of words?

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Who knows what might happen in part two… 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  6. patriciaruthsusan Avatar
    patriciaruthsusan

    A lovely beginning for a romance story, Iain. It seems you’re good at it. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Suzanne, not where I normally go, but nice for a change of pace.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  7. Snow's Fissures and Fractures Avatar
    Snow’s Fissures and Fractures

    Beautiful and light like a summer breeze.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you, lovely to see you back Lore 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  8. bearmkwa Avatar
    bearmkwa

    A lovely little scene you’ve created! 🙂 ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you so much 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  9. rochellewisoff Avatar
    rochellewisoff

    Dear Iain,

    What? No espionage? No violence. Just a sweet romance. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      I must be getting soft. Thanks Rochelle.

      Like

      Reply
  10. Rowena Avatar
    Rowena

    Hi Iain,
    The shoe is on the other foot this week and you’ve gone for romance and I’ve gone dark.
    I remember such lost opportunities from my youth and unfortunately they didn’t catch up like this. Good to be reminded of romance going well.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thanks Rowena, nice to change it up once in a while 🙂

      Like

      Reply
  11. Reena Saxena Avatar
    Reena Saxena

    A cloud of a missed opportunity…. Such a beautiful expression.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Reena

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  12. ceayr Avatar
    ceayr

    Shades of Gregory’s Girl, Iain

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Without the cheesy acting hopefully…

      Like

      Reply
  13. Sandra Avatar
    Sandra

    That was lovely. I wasn’t expecting a happy ending.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thanks Sandra, neither was I.

      Like

      Reply
  14. granonine Avatar
    granonine

    Iain, you surprised me. This was literally a dream come true. A lovely story

    By the way, I’ve just finished reading your 2nd novel, “State of Denial” and I absolutely loved it. I enjoyed your first, but this one shows some real growth in the way your draw your characters; in the spinning out of the plot, surprising us more than once. Congratulations, Iain. Best wishes as you continue this triad.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you so much Linda, yours is the first feedback and it’s always a relief to hear it was worth writing the story and sending it out into the world. I truly appreciate your support ❤️ 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  15. M K Zebra Avatar
    M K Zebra

    I really like the narration here, matches perfectly with the idea of having perhaps one too many drinks!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you, I’m glad that came across!

      Like

      Reply
  16. anotetohuguette Avatar
    anotetohuguette

    A thread of tension bubbled beneath the sweet romance unfolding below the stars….a lovely match to the nostalgic image!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you so much 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. anotetohuguette Avatar
        anotetohuguette

        My pleasure!

        Liked by 1 person

  17. Dale Avatar
    Dale

    This is a wonderful story, Iain.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Dale 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  18. Na'ama Yehuda Avatar
    Na’ama Yehuda

    🙂 Seems like some of this character’s wishes are coming true … 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      It’s nice when that happens for a change 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. Na'ama Yehuda Avatar
        Na’ama Yehuda

        Yep. Nice! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  19. msjadeli Avatar
    msjadeli

    A universal language for sure. I like the world you wove here. Magic!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you so much 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. msjadeli Avatar
        msjadeli

        You’re welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

  20. plaridel Avatar
    plaridel

    i love happy ending. i’m worried about the sequel, though. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Maybe that’s happy too…Maybe

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  21. neeltheauthor- author of WHEN LIFE THROWS THOSE CURVE BALLS Avatar
    neeltheauthor- author of WHEN LIFE THROWS THOSE CURVE BALLS

    So you write sweet little stories, too. Pleasantly surprised, Kelly.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thanks

      Like

      Reply
  22. ddeepa Avatar
    ddeepa

    Very different than the usual ones. Warm vibes! Lovely take. Do Friday Fictioneers have a deadline? Do you write until the following Thursday?

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Yes, you have a full week to write a story before the next prompt arrives. Thank you for your comment 🙂

      Like

      Reply
  23. draliman Avatar
    draliman

    A wonderful end to a wonderful night out!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Sometimes it’s that simple!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  24. Liz Young Avatar
    Liz Young

    I like the way you told your story.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Liz

      Like

      Reply
  25. Laurie Bell Avatar
    Laurie Bell

    Awwww this is lovely. Iain, nicely done. Tipsy love and hope and happiness. Love the stare off to the stars

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Laurie

      Like

      Reply
  26. Inside the Mind of Isadora Avatar
    Inside the Mind of Isadora

    Nicely done, Iain. It’s wonderful to go outside of ones usual writing. You’ve done that and extremely well.
    Isadora 😎

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  27. 4963andypop Avatar
    4963andypop

    This reads to me like a poem. Very staccato. Love all the references to light and missed opportunities. Joyous.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  28. Woman walking Max Avatar
    Woman walking Max

    A gentle story, with a happy ending, felt life affirming.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you

      Like

      Reply
  29. pennygadd51 Avatar
    pennygadd51

    I like the way you have constructed this, with the short sentences and phrases conveying a state of happy intoxication. You’ve also left an intriguing ambiguity as to the gender of the narrator. There are little hints that it’s written from a woman’s pov, but I think it’s more likely to be a gay encounter because there’s no angst about loss of trust from an earlier intimacy.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Penny

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  30. Eugenia Parrish Author Avatar
    Eugenia Parrish Author

    Oh, my, your imagery brought back vivid memories of my own young dreams and rushes. Nice.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you Eugenia

      Like

      Reply
  31. Sascha Darlington Avatar
    Sascha Darlington

    Wow, dreamy, in the moment, poetry. Very different! Loved it!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thanks Sascha

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  32. Girl in Niagara Avatar
    Girl in Niagara

    A positive and upbeat take on Dale’s picture. Enjoy the moment. I did!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thank you so much

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  33. magarisa Avatar
    magarisa

    I like the rhythm and dreamy tone of this piece. I get the feeling that the bubble is going to burst… or perhaps that’s just my pessimism talking. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      I left this one as a happy ending, but a few replies suggest there is a fair amount of pessimism out there!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  34. Dawn M. Miller Avatar
    Dawn M. Miller

    Light and airy…an uplifting read.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      Thanks Dawn

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  35. Nobbinmaug Avatar
    Nobbinmaug

    There’s been a lot written about the happy ending here. I don’t see it. Whoever let this person walk off into the night obviously intoxicated and sleep on a park bench only to go looking for them in the morning is not a good person. Uber? Lyft? Taxi? Horse & carriage?

    Two years later: “Where’s the dog?” “I let him go for a walk.” “Alone?” “Sure.”

    Five years later: “Where’s Jenny?” “She was crying, so I put her in the yard.” “You couldn’t even put a diaper on her?” “What’s the point? She keeps shitting in them.”

    That’s just the optimist in me. The pessimist thinks he’s the Park Bench Killer. He drugs his victims and follows them until they pass out on a park bench where he snuggles with them until he strangles them.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. Iain Kelly Avatar
      Iain Kelly

      So, I can put you in the pessimist category then? 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

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