Tag: nonsense
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A PIZZ A’ NONSENSE
‘Looks more like a wedding cake about to fall over than a pizza.’ ‘A pizza?’ ‘The Leaning Tower of Pizza.’ ‘No, it’s Pisa.’ ‘That’s what I said, Pizza. Anyway, don’t worry about the photo, I can straighten that up in Photoshop.’ ‘No, it’s meant to lean over like that.’ ‘That’s ridiculous, who built that?’ ‘It […]
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PETE’S MARKET STALL
Pete was well known around the local area. No matter where he set up his market stall a crowd would gather. Pete could sell anything to anyone: air conditioning units, bike parts, chopsticks, fake tattoos, parking meters. When his stall illegally blocked a street, the police were called. They left with a packet of fudge, […]
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CLOUDED JUDGEMENT
I stood in front of the bench. The sentencing judge peered down at me with a look of disgust. ‘Do you have anything to say in mitigation before sentencing?’ he asked. My solicitor had advised me against saying anything: ‘Just accept the punishment. You were found guilty. The judge will frown upon excuses.’ But I […]
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ATTACK OF THE KILLER CHICKENS
‘Do you know the closest living relative of the dinosaur is?’ Margarita sighed as little Nino stumbled through his favourite fact, delivered with glee every morning when they collected the eggs. ‘No, what is it?’ she played along. ‘The chicken!’ The boy laughed and started chasing after the group of hens in the yard, roaring […]
Iain Kelly 